MIDDLEMARCH
PART 28
BOOK VI.
THE WIDOW AND THE WIFE.
CHAPTER LIV.
"Negli occhi porta la mia donna
Amore;
Per che si fa gentil ciò ch'ella
mira:
Ov'ella passa, ogni uom ver lei si
gira,
E cui saluta fa tremar lo core.
Sicchè, bassando il viso, tutto smore,
E d'ogni suo difetto allor
sospira:
Fuggon dinanzi a lei Superbia ed
Ira:
Aiutatemi, donne, a farle onore.
Ogni dolcezza, ogni pensiero umile
Nasce nel core a chi parlar la
sente;
Ond'è beato chi prima la vide.
Quel ch'ella par quand' un poco
sorride,
Non si può dicer, nè tener a
mente,
Si è nuovo miracolo gentile."
—DANTE: la Vita
Nuova.
By that
delightful morning when the hay-ricks at Stone Court were scenting the air
quite impartially, as if Mr. Raffles had been a guest worthy of finest incense,
Dorothea had again taken up her abode at Lowick Manor. After three months
Freshitt had become rather oppressive: to sit like a model for Saint Catherine
looking rapturously at Celia's baby would not do for many hours in the day, and
to remain in that momentous babe's presence with persistent disregard was a
course that could not have been tolerated in a childless sister. Dorothea would
have been capable of carrying baby joyfully for a mile if there had been need,
and of loving it the more tenderly for that labour; but to an aunt who does not
recognize her infant nephew as Bouddha, and has nothing to do for him but to
admire, his behaviour is apt to appear monotonous, and the interest of watching
him exhaustible. This possibility was quite hidden from Celia, who felt that
Dorothea's childless widowhood fell in quite prettily with the birth of little Arthur
(baby was named after Mr. Brooke).
"Dodo
is just the creature not to mind about having anything of her own—children or
anything!" said Celia to her husband. "And if she had had a baby, it
never could have been such a dear as Arthur. Could it, James?
"Not
if it had been like Casaubon," said Sir James, conscious of some
indirectness in his answer, and of holding a strictly private opinion as to the
perfections of his first-born.
"No!
just imagine! Really it was a mercy," said Celia; "and I think it is
very nice for Dodo to be a widow. She can be just as fond of our baby as if it
were her own, and she can have as many notions of her own as she likes."
"It
is a pity she was not a queen," said the devout Sir James.
"But
what should we have been then? We must have been something else," said
Celia, objecting to so laborious a flight of imagination. "I like her
better as she is."
Hence,
when she found that Dorothea was making arrangements for her final departure to
Lowick, Celia raised her eyebrows with disappointment, and in her quiet
unemphatic way shot a needle-arrow of sarcasm.
"What
will you do at Lowick, Dodo? You say yourself there is nothing to be done
there: everybody is so clean and well off, it makes you quite melancholy. And
here you have been so happy going all about Tipton with Mr. Garth into the
worst backyards. And now uncle is abroad, you and Mr. Garth can have it all
your own way; and I am sure James does everything you tell him."
"I
shall often come here, and I shall see how baby grows all the better,"
said Dorothea.
"But
you will never see him washed," said Celia; "and that is quite the
best part of the day." She was almost pouting: it did seem to her very
hard in Dodo to go away from the baby when she might stay.
"Dear
Kitty, I will come and stay all night on purpose," said Dorothea;
"but I want to be alone now, and in my own home. I wish to know the
Farebrothers better, and to talk to Mr. Farebrother about what there is to be
done in Middlemarch."
Dorothea's
native strength of will was no longer all converted into resolute submission.
She had a great yearning to be at Lowick, and was simply determined to go, not
feeling bound to tell all her reasons. But every one around her disapproved.
Sir James was much pained, and offered that they should all migrate to
Cheltenham for a few months with the sacred ark, otherwise called a cradle: at
that period a man could hardly know what to propose if Cheltenham were
rejected.
The
Dowager Lady Chettam, just returned from a visit to her daughter in town,
wished, at least, that Mrs. Vigo should be written to, and invited to accept
the office of companion to Mrs. Casaubon: it was not credible that Dorothea as
a young widow would think of living alone in the house at Lowick. Mrs. Vigo had
been reader and secretary to royal personages, and in point of knowledge and
sentiments even Dorothea could have nothing to object to her.
Mrs.
Cadwallader said, privately, "You will certainly go mad in that house
alone, my dear. You will see visions. We have all got to exert ourselves a
little to keep sane, and call things by the same names as other people call
them by. To be sure, for younger sons and women who have no money, it is a sort
of provision to go mad: they are taken care of then. But you must not run into
that. I dare say you are a little bored here with our good dowager; but think
what a bore you might become yourself to your fellow-creatures if you were
always playing tragedy queen and taking things sublimely. Sitting alone in that
library at Lowick you may fancy yourself ruling the weather; you must get a few
people round you who wouldn't believe you if you told them. That is a good
lowering medicine."
"I
never called everything by the same name that all the people about me
did," said Dorothea, stoutly.
"But
I suppose you have found out your mistake, my dear," said Mrs.
Cadwallader, "and that is a proof of sanity."
Dorothea
was aware of the sting, but it did not hurt her. "No," she said,
"I still think that the greater part of the world is mistaken about many
things. Surely one may be sane and yet think so, since the greater part of the
world has often had to come round from its opinion."
Mrs.
Cadwallader said no more on that point to Dorothea, but to her husband she
remarked, "It will be well for her to marry again as soon as it is proper,
if one could get her among the right people. Of course the Chettams would not
wish it. But I see clearly a husband is the best thing to keep her in order. If
we were not so poor I would invite Lord Triton. He will be marquis some day,
and there is no denying that she would make a good marchioness: she looks
handsomer than ever in her mourning."
"My
dear Elinor, do let the poor woman alone. Such contrivances are of no
use," said the easy Rector.
"No
use? How are matches made, except by bringing men and women together? And it is
a shame that her uncle should have run away and shut up the Grange just now.
There ought to be plenty of eligible matches invited to Freshitt and the
Grange. Lord Triton is precisely the man: full of plans for making the people
happy in a soft-headed sort of way. That would just suit Mrs. Casaubon."
"Let
Mrs. Casaubon choose for herself, Elinor."
"That
is the nonsense you wise men talk! How can she choose if she has no variety to
choose from? A woman's choice usually means taking the only man she can get.
Mark my words, Humphrey. If her friends don't exert themselves, there will be a
worse business than the Casaubon business yet."
"For
heaven's sake don't touch on that topic, Elinor! It is a very sore point with
Sir James. He would be deeply offended if you entered on it to him
unnecessarily."
"I
have never entered on it," said Mrs Cadwallader, opening her hands.
"Celia told me all about the will at the beginning, without any asking of
mine."
"Yes,
yes; but they want the thing hushed up, and I understand that the young fellow
is going out of the neighborhood."
Mrs.
Cadwallader said nothing, but gave her husband three significant nods, with a
very sarcastic expression in her dark eyes.
Dorothea
quietly persisted in spite of remonstrance and persuasion. So by the end of
June the shutters were all opened at Lowick Manor, and the morning gazed calmly
into the library, shining on the rows of note-books as it shines on the weary
waste planted with huge stones, the mute memorial of a forgotten faith; and the
evening laden with roses entered silently into the blue-green boudoir where
Dorothea chose oftenest to sit. At first she walked into every room,
questioning the eighteen months of her married life, and carrying on her
thoughts as if they were a speech to be heard by her husband. Then, she
lingered in the library and could not be at rest till she had carefully ranged
all the note-books as she imagined that he would wish to see them, in orderly
sequence. The pity which had been the restraining compelling motive in her life
with him still clung about his image, even while she remonstrated with him in
indignant thought and told him that he was unjust. One little act of hers may
perhaps be smiled at as superstitious. The Synoptical Tabulation for the use of
Mrs. Casaubon, she carefully enclosed and sealed, writing within the envelope,
"I could not use it. Do you not see now that I could not submit my soul to
yours, by working hopelessly at what I have no belief in—Dorothea?" Then
she deposited the paper in her own desk.
That
silent colloquy was perhaps only the more earnest because underneath and through
it all there was always the deep longing which had really determined her to
come to Lowick. The longing was to see Will Ladislaw. She did not know any good
that could come of their meeting: she was helpless; her hands had been tied
from making up to him for any unfairness in his lot. But her soul thirsted to
see him. How could it be otherwise? If a princess in the days of enchantment
had seen a four-footed creature from among those which live in herds come to
her once and again with a human gaze which rested upon her with choice and
beseeching, what would she think of in her journeying, what would she look for
when the herds passed her? Surely for the gaze which had found her, and which
she would know again. Life would be no better than candle-light tinsel and
daylight rubbish if our spirits were not touched by what has been, to issues of
longing and constancy. It was true that Dorothea wanted to know the
Farebrothers better, and especially to talk to the new rector, but also true
that remembering what Lydgate had told her about Will Ladislaw and little Miss
Noble, she counted on Will's coming to Lowick to see the Farebrother family.
The very first Sunday, before she entered the church, she saw him as she
had seen him the last time she was there, alone in the clergyman's pew; but when
she entered his figure was gone.
In the
week-days when she went to see the ladies at the Rectory, she listened in vain
for some word that they might let fall about Will; but it seemed to her that
Mrs. Farebrother talked of every one else in the neighborhood and out of it.
"Probably
some of Mr. Farebrother's Middlemarch hearers may follow him to Lowick
sometimes. Do you not think so?" said Dorothea, rather despising herself
for having a secret motive in asking the question.
"If
they are wise they will, Mrs. Casaubon," said the old lady. "I see
that you set a right value on my son's preaching. His grandfather on my side
was an excellent clergyman, but his father was in the law:—most exemplary and
honest nevertheless, which is a reason for our never being rich. They say
Fortune is a woman and capricious. But sometimes she is a good woman and gives
to those who merit, which has been the case with you, Mrs. Casaubon, who have
given a living to my son."
Mrs.
Farebrother recurred to her knitting with a dignified satisfaction in her neat
little effort at oratory, but this was not what Dorothea wanted to hear. Poor
thing! she did not even know whether Will Ladislaw was still at Middlemarch,
and there was no one whom she dared to ask, unless it were Lydgate. But just
now she could not see Lydgate without sending for him or going to seek him.
Perhaps Will Ladislaw, having heard of that strange ban against him left by Mr.
Casaubon, had felt it better that he and she should not meet again, and perhaps
she was wrong to wish for a meeting that others might find many good reasons
against. Still "I do wish it" came at the end of those wise
reflections as naturally as a sob after holding the breath. And the meeting did
happen, but in a formal way quite unexpected by her.
One
morning, about eleven, Dorothea was seated in her boudoir with a map of the
land attached to the manor and other papers before her, which were to help her
in making an exact statement for herself of her income and affairs. She had not
yet applied herself to her work, but was seated with her hands folded on her
lap, looking out along the avenue of limes to the distant fields. Every leaf
was at rest in the sunshine, the familiar scene was changeless, and seemed to represent
the prospect of her life, full of motiveless ease—motiveless, if her own energy
could not seek out reasons for ardent action. The widow's cap of those times
made an oval frame for the face, and had a crown standing up; the dress was an
experiment in the utmost laying on of crape; but this heavy solemnity of
clothing made her face look all the younger, with its recovered bloom, and the
sweet, inquiring candour of her eyes.
Her
reverie was broken by Tantripp, who came to say that Mr. Ladislaw was below,
and begged permission to see Madam if it were not too early.
"I
will see him," said Dorothea, rising immediately. "Let him be shown
into the drawing-room."
The
drawing-room was the most neutral room in the house to her—the one least
associated with the trials of her married life: the damask matched the
wood-work, which was all white and gold; there were two tall mirrors and tables
with nothing on them—in brief, it was a room where you had no reason for
sitting in one place rather than in another. It was below the boudoir, and had
also a bow-window looking out on the avenue. But when Pratt showed Will
Ladislaw into it the window was open; and a winged visitor, buzzing in and out
now and then without minding the furniture, made the room look less formal and
uninhabited.
"Glad
to see you here again, sir," said Pratt, lingering to adjust a blind.
"I
am only come to say good-by, Pratt," said Will, who wished even the butler
to know that he was too proud to hang about Mrs. Casaubon now she was a rich
widow.
"Very
sorry to hear it, sir," said Pratt, retiring. Of course, as a servant who
was to be told nothing, he knew the fact of which Ladislaw was still ignorant,
and had drawn his inferences; indeed, had not differed from his betrothed
Tantripp when she said, "Your master was as jealous as a fiend—and no
reason. Madam would look higher than Mr. Ladislaw, else I don't know her. Mrs.
Cadwallader's maid says there's a lord coming who is to marry her when the
mourning's over."
There
were not many moments for Will to walk about with his hat in his hand before
Dorothea entered. The meeting was very different from that first meeting in
Rome when Will had been embarrassed and Dorothea calm. This time he felt
miserable but determined, while she was in a state of agitation which could not
be hidden. Just outside the door she had felt that this longed-for meeting was
after all too difficult, and when she saw Will advancing towards her, the deep
blush which was rare in her came with painful suddenness. Neither of them knew
how it was, but neither of them spoke. She gave her hand for a moment, and then
they went to sit down near the window, she on one settee and he on another
opposite. Will was peculiarly uneasy: it seemed to him not like Dorothea that
the mere fact of her being a widow should cause such a change in her manner of
receiving him; and he knew of no other condition which could have affected
their previous relation to each other—except that, as his imagination at once
told him, her friends might have been poisoning her mind with their suspicions
of him.
"I
hope I have not presumed too much in calling," said Will; "I could
not bear to leave the neighborhood and begin a new life without seeing you to
say good-by."
"Presumed?
Surely not. I should have thought it unkind if you had not wished to see
me," said Dorothea, her habit of speaking with perfect genuineness
asserting itself through all her uncertainty and agitation. "Are you going
away immediately?"
"Very
soon, I think. I intend to go to town and eat my dinners as a barrister, since,
they say, that is the preparation for all public business. There will be a
great deal of political work to be done by-and-by, and I mean to try and do
some of it. Other men have managed to win an honourable position for themselves
without family or money."
"And
that will make it all the more honourable," said Dorothea, ardently.
"Besides, you have so many talents. I have heard from my uncle how well
you speak in public, so that every one is sorry when you leave off, and how
clearly you can explain things. And you care that justice should be done to
every one. I am so glad. When we were in Rome, I thought you only cared for
poetry and art, and the things that adorn life for us who are well off. But now
I know you think about the rest of the world."
While she
was speaking Dorothea had lost her personal embarrassment, and had become like
her former self. She looked at Will with a direct glance, full of delighted
confidence.
"You
approve of my going away for years, then, and never coming here again till I
have made myself of some mark in the world?" said Will, trying hard to
reconcile the utmost pride with the utmost effort to get an expression of
strong feeling from Dorothea.
She was
not aware how long it was before she answered. She had turned her head and was
looking out of the window on the rose-bushes, which seemed to have in them the
summers of all the years when Will would be away. This was not judicious
behavior. But Dorothea never thought of studying her manners: she thought only
of bowing to a sad necessity which divided her from Will. Those first words of his
about his intentions had seemed to make everything clear to her: he knew, she
supposed, all about Mr. Casaubon's final conduct in relation to him, and it had
come to him with the same sort of shock as to herself. He had never felt more
than friendship for her—had never had anything in his mind to justify what she
felt to be her husband's outrage on the feelings of both: and that friendship
he still felt. Something which may be called an inward silent sob had gone on
in Dorothea before she said with a pure voice, just trembling in the last words
as if only from its liquid flexibility—
"Yes,
it must be right for you to do as you say. I shall be very happy when I hear
that you have made your value felt. But you must have patience. It will perhaps
be a long while."
Will
never quite knew how it was that he saved himself from falling down at her
feet, when the "long while" came forth with its gentle tremor. He
used to say that the horrible hue and surface of her crape dress was most
likely the sufficient controlling force. He sat still, however, and only said—
"I
shall never hear from you. And you will forget all about me."
"No,"
said Dorothea, "I shall never forget you. I have never forgotten any one
whom I once knew. My life has never been crowded, and seems not likely to be
so. And I have a great deal of space for memory at Lowick, haven't I?" She
smiled.
"Good
God!" Will burst out passionately, rising, with his hat still in his hand,
and walking away to a marble table, where he suddenly turned and leaned his
back against it. The blood had mounted to his face and neck, and he looked
almost angry. It had seemed to him as if they were like two creatures slowly
turning to marble in each other's presence, while their hearts were conscious
and their eyes were yearning. But there was no help for it. It should never be
true of him that in this meeting to which he had come with bitter resolution he
had ended by a confession which might be interpreted into asking for her
fortune. Moreover, it was actually true that he was fearful of the effect which
such confessions might have on Dorothea herself.
She
looked at him from that distance in some trouble, imagining that there might
have been an offence in her words. But all the while there was a current of
thought in her about his probable want of money, and the impossibility of her
helping him. If her uncle had been at home, something might have been done
through him! It was this preoccupation with the hardship of Will's wanting
money, while she had what ought to have been his share, which led her to say,
seeing that he remained silent and looked away from her—
"I
wonder whether you would like to have that miniature which hangs up-stairs—I
mean that beautiful miniature of your grandmother. I think it is not right for
me to keep it, if you would wish to have it. It is wonderfully like you."
"You
are very good," said Will, irritably. "No; I don't mind about it. It
is not very consoling to have one's own likeness. It would be more consoling if
others wanted to have it."
"I
thought you would like to cherish her memory—I thought—" Dorothea broke
off an instant, her imagination suddenly warning her away from Aunt Julia's
history—"you would surely like to have the miniature as a family
memorial."
"Why
should I have that, when I have nothing else! A man with only a portmanteau for
his stowage must keep his memorials in his head."
Will
spoke at random: he was merely venting his petulance; it was a little too
exasperating to have his grandmother's portrait offered him at that moment. But
to Dorothea's feeling his words had a peculiar sting. She rose and said with a
touch of indignation as well as hauteur—
"You
are much the happier of us two, Mr. Ladislaw, to have nothing."
Will was
startled. Whatever the words might be, the tone seemed like a dismissal; and
quitting his leaning posture, he walked a little way towards her. Their eyes
met, but with a strange questioning gravity. Something was keeping their minds
aloof, and each was left to conjecture what was in the other. Will had really
never thought of himself as having a claim of inheritance on the property which
was held by Dorothea, and would have required a narrative to make him
understand her present feeling.
"I
never felt it a misfortune to have nothing till now," he said. "But
poverty may be as bad as leprosy, if it divides us from what we most care
for."
The words
cut Dorothea to the heart, and made her relent. She answered in a tone of sad
fellowship.
"Sorrow
comes in so many ways. Two years ago I had no notion of that—I mean of the
unexpected way in which trouble comes, and ties our hands, and makes us silent
when we long to speak. I used to despise women a little for not shaping their
lives more, and doing better things. I was very fond of doing as I liked, but I
have almost given it up," she ended, smiling playfully.
"I
have not given up doing as I like, but I can very seldom do it," said
Will. He was standing two yards from her with his mind full of contradictory
desires and resolves—desiring some unmistakable proof that she loved him, and
yet dreading the position into which such a proof might bring him. "The
thing one most longs for may be surrounded with conditions that would be
intolerable."
At this
moment Pratt entered and said, "Sir James Chettam is in the library,
madam."
"Ask
Sir James to come in here," said Dorothea, immediately. It was as if the
same electric shock had passed through her and Will. Each of them felt proudly
resistant, and neither looked at the other, while they awaited Sir James's
entrance.
After
shaking hands with Dorothea, he bowed as slightly as possible to Ladislaw, who
repaid the slightness exactly, and then going towards Dorothea, said—
"I
must say good-by, Mrs. Casaubon; and probably for a long while."
Dorothea
put out her hand and said her good-by cordially. The sense that Sir James was
depreciating Will, and behaving rudely to him, roused her resolution and
dignity: there was no touch of confusion in her manner. And when Will had left
the room, she looked with such calm self-possession at Sir James, saying,
"How is Celia?" that he was obliged to behave as if nothing had
annoyed him. And what would be the use of behaving otherwise? Indeed, Sir James
shrank with so much dislike from the association even in thought of Dorothea
with Ladislaw as her possible lover, that he would himself have wished to avoid
an outward show of displeasure which would have recognized the disagreeable
possibility. If any one had asked him why he shrank in that way, I am not sure
that he would at first have said anything fuller or more precise than "That
Ladislaw!"—though on reflection he might have urged that Mr. Casaubon's
codicil, barring Dorothea's marriage with Will, except under a penalty, was
enough to cast unfitness over any relation at all between them. His aversion
was all the stronger because he felt himself unable to interfere.
But Sir
James was a power in a way unguessed by himself. Entering at that moment, he
was an incorporation of the strongest reasons through which Will's pride became
a repellent force, keeping him asunder from Dorothea.
CHAPTER LV.
Hath she her faults? I would you had them too.
They are the fruity must of soundest
wine;
Or say, they are regenerating fire
Such as hath turned the dense black
element
Into a crystal pathway for the sun.
If youth
is the season of hope, it is often so only in the sense that our elders are
hopeful about us; for no age is so apt as youth to think its emotions,
partings, and resolves are the last of their kind. Each crisis seems final,
simply because it is new. We are told that the oldest inhabitants in Peru do
not cease to be agitated by the earthquakes, but they probably see beyond each
shock, and reflect that there are plenty more to come.
To
Dorothea, still in that time of youth when the eyes with their long full lashes
look out after their rain of tears unsoiled and unwearied as a freshly opened
passion-flower, that morning's parting with Will Ladislaw seemed to be the
close of their personal relations. He was going away into the distance of
unknown years, and if ever he came back he would be another man. The actual
state of his mind—his proud resolve to give the lie beforehand to any suspicion
that he would play the needy adventurer seeking a rich woman—lay quite out of
her imagination, and she had interpreted all his behaviour easily enough by her
supposition that Mr. Casaubon's codicil seemed to him, as it did to her, a
gross and cruel interdict on any active friendship between them. Their young
delight in speaking to each other, and saying what no one else would care to
hear, was forever ended, and become a treasure of the past. For this very
reason she dwelt on it without inward check. That unique happiness too was
dead, and in its shadowed silent chamber she might vent the passionate grief
which she herself wondered at. For the first time she took down the miniature
from the wall and kept it before her, liking to blend the woman who had been
too hardly judged with the grandson whom her own heart and judgment defended.
Can any one who has rejoiced in woman's tenderness think it a reproach to her
that she took the little oval picture in her palm and made a bed for it there,
and leaned her cheek upon it, as if that would soothe the creatures who had
suffered unjust condemnation? She did not know then that it was Love who had
come to her briefly, as in a dream before awaking, with the hues of morning on
his wings—that it was Love to whom she was sobbing her farewell as his image
was banished by the blameless rigour of irresistible day. She only felt that
there was something irrevocably amiss and lost in her lot, and her thoughts
about the future were the more readily shapen into resolve. Ardent souls, ready
to construct their coming lives, are apt to commit themselves to the fulfilment
of their own visions.
One day
that she went to Freshitt to fulfil her promise of staying all night and seeing
baby washed, Mrs. Cadwallader came to dine, the Rector being gone on a fishing
excursion. It was a warm evening, and even in the delightful drawing-room,
where the fine old turf sloped from the open window towards a lilied pool and
well-planted mounds, the heat was enough to make Celia in her white muslin and
light curls reflect with pity on what Dodo must feel in her black dress and
close cap. But this was not until some episodes with baby were over, and had
left her mind at leisure. She had seated herself and taken up a fan for some
time before she said, in her quiet guttural—
"Dear
Dodo, do throw off that cap. I am sure your dress must make you feel ill."
"I
am so used to the cap—it has become a sort of shell," said Dorothea,
smiling. "I feel rather bare and exposed when it is off."
"I
must see you without it; it makes us all warm," said Celia, throwing down
her fan, and going to Dorothea. It was a pretty picture to see this little lady
in white muslin unfastening the widow's cap from her more majestic sister, and
tossing it on to a chair. Just as the coils and braids of dark-brown hair had
been set free, Sir James entered the room. He looked at the released head, and
said, "Ah!" in a tone of satisfaction.
"It
was I who did it, James," said Celia. "Dodo need not make such a
slavery of her mourning; she need not wear that cap any more among her
friends."
"My
dear Celia," said Lady Chettam, "a widow must wear her mourning at
least a year."
"Not
if she marries again before the end of it," said Mrs. Cadwallader, who had
some pleasure in startling her good friend the Dowager. Sir James was annoyed,
and leaned forward to play with Celia's Maltese dog.
"That
is very rare, I hope," said Lady Chettam, in a tone intended to guard
against such events. "No friend of ours ever committed herself in that way
except Mrs. Beevor, and it was very painful to Lord Grinsell when she did so.
Her first husband was objectionable, which made it the greater wonder. And
severely she was punished for it. They said Captain Beevor dragged her about by
the hair, and held up loaded pistols at her."
"Oh,
if she took the wrong man!" said Mrs. Cadwallader, who was in a decidedly
wicked mood. "Marriage is always bad then, first or second. Priority is a
poor recommendation in a husband if he has got no other. I would rather have a
good second husband than an indifferent first."
"My
dear, your clever tongue runs away with you," said Lady Chettam. "I
am sure you would be the last woman to marry again prematurely, if our dear
Rector were taken away."
"Oh,
I make no vows; it might be a necessary economy. It is lawful to marry again, I
suppose; else we might as well be Hindoos instead of Christians. Of course if a
woman accepts the wrong man, she must take the consequences, and one who does
it twice over deserves her fate. But if she can marry blood, beauty, and
bravery—the sooner the better."
"I
think the subject of our conversation is very ill-chosen," said Sir James,
with a look of disgust. "Suppose we change it."
"Not
on my account, Sir James," said Dorothea, determined not to lose the
opportunity of freeing herself from certain oblique references to excellent
matches. "If you are speaking on my behalf, I can assure you that no
question can be more indifferent and impersonal to me than second marriage. It
is no more to me than if you talked of women going fox-hunting: whether it is
admirable in them or not, I shall not follow them. Pray let Mrs. Cadwallader
amuse herself on that subject as much as on any other."
"My
dear Mrs. Casaubon," said Lady Chettam, in her stateliest way, "you
do not, I hope, think there was any allusion to you in my mentioning Mrs.
Beevor. It was only an instance that occurred to me. She was step-daughter to
Lord Grinsell: he married Mrs. Teveroy for his second wife. There could be no
possible allusion to you."
"Oh
no," said Celia. "Nobody chose the subject; it all came out of Dodo's
cap. Mrs. Cadwallader only said what was quite true. A woman could not be
married in a widow's cap, James."
"Hush,
my dear!" said Mrs. Cadwallader. "I will not offend again. I will not
even refer to Dido or Zenobia. Only what are we to talk about? I, for my part,
object to the discussion of Human Nature, because that is the nature of
rectors' wives."
Later in
the evening, after Mrs. Cadwallader was gone, Celia said privately to Dorothea,
"Really, Dodo, taking your cap off made you like yourself again in more
ways than one. You spoke up just as you used to do, when anything was said to
displease you. But I could hardly make out whether it was James that you
thought wrong, or Mrs. Cadwallader."
"Neither,"
said Dorothea. "James spoke out of delicacy to me, but he was mistaken in
supposing that I minded what Mrs. Cadwallader said. I should only mind if there
were a law obliging me to take any piece of blood and beauty that she or
anybody else recommended."
"But
you know, Dodo, if you ever did marry, it would be all the better to have blood
and beauty," said Celia, reflecting that Mr. Casaubon had not been richly
endowed with those gifts, and that it would be well to caution Dorothea in
time.
"Don't
be anxious, Kitty; I have quite other thoughts about my life. I shall never
marry again," said Dorothea, touching her sister's chin, and looking at
her with indulgent affection. Celia was nursing her baby, and Dorothea had come
to say good-night to her.
"Really—quite?"
said Celia. "Not anybody at all—if he were very wonderful indeed?"
Dorothea
shook her head slowly. "Not anybody at all. I have delightful plans. I
should like to take a great deal of land, and drain it, and make a little
colony, where everybody should work, and all the work should be done well. I
should know every one of the people and be their friend. I am going to have
great consultations with Mr. Garth: he can tell me almost everything I want to
know."
"Then
you will be happy, if you have a plan, Dodo?" said Celia.
"Perhaps little Arthur will like plans when he grows up, and then he can
help you."
Sir James
was informed that same night that Dorothea was really quite set against
marrying anybody at all, and was going to take to "all sorts of
plans," just like what she used to have. Sir James made no remark. To his
secret feeling there was something repulsive in a woman's second marriage, and
no match would prevent him from feeling it a sort of desecration for Dorothea.
He was aware that the world would regard such a sentiment as preposterous,
especially in relation to a woman of one-and-twenty; the practice of "the
world" being to treat of a young widow's second marriage as certain and
probably near, and to smile with meaning if the widow acts accordingly. But if
Dorothea did choose to espouse her solitude, he felt that the resolution would
well become her.
To be
continued